close commentary

close	The range of the subject matter/theme of this poem is inherent in the ambiguity of the title word: i) close = intimacy, ii) close = ending. The poem is, perhaps, about the knots of personal life - the shared intimacies and guilts of an adulterous affair (and as such to be tied to the next poem in the book: Adultery )
lock the door	The poem begins with an action to ensure privacy - to allow an intimacy between the speaker of the poem and the addressee in the 'hired room' which is the site of the poem. But there is something ironic about this - in several ways: i) even if the door is locked, it does not prevent the observation of the two lovers by the 'two childhoods' standing in the corner in the first verse, and the 'ghosts of ourselves' looking up to the open window in the last verse. The present cannot be locked away from the past; a person's actions cannot be hidden from their sense of their own self. ii) The poem is both private and 'confessional' in feel - this has implications for its interpretation - but, as a published poem, it is also a 'public' document. It both presents itself for interpretation, and, at the same moment, makes that interpretation difficult. It 'locks the door' and opens it in the same gesture. Contrast how this poem is interpreted - what the reader has to do - with the process involved in the interpretation of a poem like The Captain of the 1964 Top of the Form Team.
dark journey of our night	The ' dark journey' is, perhaps, the continued discovery of each other's intimate selves ( 'take each other to bits' ); also, their own individual dreams ( in which their 'two childhoods' are made present in the scene now - their past desires and hopes: these 'ghosts' of themselves. The phrase perhaps also recalls 'the dark night of the soul' - a phrase from the 17th century Spanish mystic/poet St John of the Cross, and 'naturalised' into English poetry by T S Eliot in the 20th century. 'The dark night of the soul' is the soul's approach to God through negatives - a loss of knowledge, certainty, faith even. St John of the Cross brought into the expression of Christian faith the forms and language of love poetry: Duffy is bringing into secular poetry the terms of religion.
two childhoods	The adult lovers are as if observed by their past childhood selves ( quite a disturbing notion ). This also links several themes of the book together: the poems about the past, which open the volume, and the poems on relationships which dominate the middle pages. The pains and pleasures of adult, sexual love and lust are not separate from the childhood of the individuals involved; any love affair brings with it that 'deep' baggage of past desires, guilts, experience.
each other to bits	This sounds at once both destructive and intimate
stare at our hearts	Who is 'staring at our heart'? The grammar of the sentence allows both the two childhoods staring at the adults lovers' hearts ( with what feelings? - disappointment, horror?), and the two lovers themselves (taking 'each other to bits' in order to understand themselves properly - understand who you love, you understand, perhaps, who you are )
a lost accent	These dreams - these recollections of past childhood selves - are, however, beyond proper secure recall - that is, the childhood self speaks a different language: the connection to childhood is both present and 'lost' at the same time. (Throughout Mean Time, understanding/confusion, connection/disconnection, identity/difference are expressed by using analogies to language).
you know the truth	'You' - the lover addressed in the poem knows 'the truth'. But what 'truth'? - the truth about this relationship; the truth about the distance between their present selves and their childhood selves; the 'truth' that the poem is expressing - whatever that is? ( And note: if this is about an adulterous affair, how the notion of truth itself must be tinged with irony - the affair itself necessarily being constructed out of lies told to other partners.)
undress	Like the beginning of verse 1 (and also verse 5 ), an order or imperative. What is the course of this affair? In terms of simple actions - a repetitive series of undressing and dressing ( Undress...Dress again. Undress ) - a reductive definition of the experience, a kind of disenchanted tone. It sounds like a tired simplification - leaving out the emotion felt, the 'love'. As such' it is not sustained across the verse as a whole - the second half of the verse will restore the complications of the emotions.
a suitcase	The suitcase suggests the scene of the hotel room - the site of this affair. But it is also metaphoric - the baggage of lies that the lovers must carry and accumulate in conducting their affair, until they have accumulated so much they cannot be borne ( the suitcase 'bursts' open ).
have me like a drawing	Like in 'take each other to bits' and the later line 'it has me where I want me..', this line (and the following one with its 'erased, coloured in..' ) suggests a kind of desire to reconstitute, control the partner in lovemaking - setting up a kind of inherent contradiction in the poem: there's the continued presence of the past (the 'childhoods', the 'ghosts of ourselves' ) versus the immediate pressure of desire in the present moment. This 'two-way pull' has much to do with the tension of the poem, its sense of not being sure where it wants to be.
signed by your tongue	The most simply sexual, physical line in the poem, but it continues the sense of 'possession' involved in sex (signing claims ownership, authorship - which is contradicted by the continuing presence of the separate pasts of the two lovers).
the name of a country...unreadable	Under the pressure of present desire, the connection to the past, where the speaker has come from, seems to disappear. Their home address has become 'unreadable'. (Compare to The Captain of the 1964 Top of the Form Team : ...My country. I want it back. In that poem, the speaker's past is compared to a country, similarly lost - except the poem suggests a more historical/social reason for the loss of the past, and the persona in the poem is set up to be 'politically' criticised; his 'nostalgia' is dubious in its value. This poem suggests that there is a more tangled root to nostalgia - less easily judged than the 'satire' of the former poem would suggest.)
where I live now....homeless	If the previous sentence suggests that the past seems to be lost by the pressure of desire, this sentence suggests that the present sense of the self also seems to disappear. Shake suggests at the same time both a physical and psychological reaction; both pleasurable (orgasmic) and fearful.
a coin falls...	The coin falls from the table continuing the idea of 'shake'. 'How the hell can I win?' - since there is so much that is difficult in the relationship: its squalid routine, its lies, the knots of desire and guilt. 'How can I lose?' - since it does bring physical pleasure. The value to be placed on the relationship seems equally balanced; again, a cause of the tension in the poem.
tell me again	Another order/request to the lover: to persuade her that this is worthwhile, use the traditional words of love (like 'I love you', perhaps).
love wont give in	Whatever the multiple tensions of the relationship - as so far expressed in the poem - love, desire overrides them. Desire's ability to continue despite all other factors, its force, is also expressed in other poems in the volume - for example, Havisham - the next poem but one in the book. Despite, or because, of the force of 'love' in these poems in Mean Time it is seldom described here as simply pleasurable; instead its more usual depiction is as tense and tortured.
tremble	Continuing the idea of the earlier 'shake'. The force of love is described through the objects which surround it (a tactic which is the basis of the poem Disgrace - where it is the absence of love which the surroundings express.)
the pity of bells	Church bells overheard from the hotel ('hired') room. Why pity? Perhaps they celebrate a wedding? Perhaps they suggest a kind of harmony which is beyond the grasp of these two lovers?
a cigarette smoke itself..	The cigarette and the glass of wine are overlooked because of the urgencies of desire.
time ache itself into space	Love, desire, seems to make the present moment complete in itself - without concern for past and future; it seems to cancel the dimension of Time. That is what it seems to promise; of course, other verses in this poem (the first and last particularly ) show that that promise is not quite so easily fulfilled; the lovers are haunted by 'the ghosts of ourselves, behind and before us..' But with the full urgency of desire there seems to be only a 'Now' (note how this word is emphasized by being separated from its sentence by the line break ).
it has me where I want me	A line of greatly compressed meaning through the simple replacement of an expected pronoun. Desire is compelling; it forces the speaker to be in this position, in this place (this bed in this 'hired' room ). Given that, the expected line would be: 'it has me where it wants me'. But the line as written is:' it has me where I want me', because, of course, desire is not an externally compelling force; it is the person's own desire - what they want. The change to the expected phrase isn't simply producing an emphasis to meaning through surprise; it suggests also some of the instability of guilty desires: they are both yours and not yours, both what you want to do and not what you want to do.
now you, you do	The last phrases of the sentence have several possible meanings - which the simple and flat commas refuse to sort out. They could mean: now you have me where you want me, just like love has me where it wants me. Or they could mean: now love has me where it wants me, you will do for me (i.e. you are acceptable)
put out the light	An instruction beginning the last verse, just as the first verse began with an instruction. The poem as it were follows the events of this evening tryst in the hotel room. It also suggests a kind of closure to the poem, of exhaustion rather than of decision or achieved understanding. After examining this love through four verses, the subject is to be put aside, buried (temporarily) in darkness - since partly the poem is about the difficulties of reaching a decision for the will to act upon. (The will is helpless when desire compels ).
years stand outside	The years standing outside and' the ghosts of ourselves' are in the same position as the two childhoods in the first verse - again suggesting a kind of failure of the poem to move its subject forward.
they know who we are	The line has a suggestion of threat; the lovers cannot hide from their own past and futures. (They might hide from others who would want to know about the affair, but the present 'now' is still answerable to the individuals' own continuing sense of self - which cannot be cancelled so simply by the temporary urgencies of desire.)

Close	Do you agree/disagree with this commentary? Anything you want to add? stevebrown@clara.co.uk
	complete text of the poem