Issue Four.

A simple title which summed up the mood of the editorial team at the time of publication. Cult hero goalkeeper Marlon Beresford had recently been sold to Middlesbrough and team's form was patchy. Relegation looked like a certainty. The protracted take over had still not been resolved and there was a definite feeling of finality about the proceedings. This issue was launched on 4^th April 1998 at Northampton's Sixfields Stadium. The rain poured from the skies and we had a right barney with the head of safety at the stadium, who tried to make us sell the fanzines in the middle of a roundabout due to us 'increasing the risk of crowd violence'. Thanks must go to the local coppers who backed us up in our quarrel. Oh yes, we won 1-0!

Highlights of the edition:
You're Not Worthy - the Sausage nominates the best and worst players of the season
Explaining the Inexplicable - Mr Tickle asks the rhetorical question: Why do we put ourselves through hell to watch the Clarets? An article subsequently pinched by the Bristol City fanzine Come In Number Seven
Who Calls the Tune? - just why were the officials at BFC were so keen to play Van Halen's Jump as the players ran out at the Turf?

Best Quote:
"I would like to provoke a debate in your pages as to who has got, or had, the largest swede in football. The only contender in my opinion is that huge slice of kebab meat that rests on Ron Atkinson's shoulders. I think it would be a good idea for the Clarets to sign players with big bonces. If your mate has a monumental kite, get on the blower to Waddle and let's have him in the squad."
Bodge - Letters page